Why the chicken crossed the road ...

Or at the very least I can tell you why this chicken crossed the road -o*
I came hopping along merrily down a warm and a bit dusty road here in Aarhus the other day. Clucking a happy tune and minding my own business out looking for some nice corn or grain or a juicy worm or something *O*
... really ... some aspects of this here fine feathered life is not for the faint hearted people ... Really - WORMS !!! Yuck *o*
Then suddenly I saw my dear sweet imaginary Johnny standing across the street talking to a beautiful tall blonde with breast the size of ... Well, bigger than her hips anyway.
And it is quite the opposite with this chick - my tail feathers have amble room to spread on where as my breast is ... Not much chicken breast to be had here -_-
My Johnny laughed at something the ... woman said and patted her arm the way he does when satisfied with people and my heart sank so low it ran out through the toes of my shoes ...
Had my sweetie finally decide that I had been right all along and that such a beautiful man as himself ought to have an equally beautiful woman by his side?
I was about to turn my beak into the public library just beside the road and buried my sorrow in Whisky Galore when Johnny turned from the woman and saw me - and the most beautiful happy smile spread across his gorgeous face ...
So that gorgeous smile is the reason why this chicken at least crossed the road !!! *O* !!!
I flew head first cackling happily and flapping my wings rather wildly into the traffic. Narrowly missed a bus by the grace of God and the good driving of a quick, but swearing bus driver. And only missed the eighteen wheeler truck in the other lane by running beneath it.
Luckily chickens are short people -o*
I sprang into my darling - and by that time quite scared - Johnny´s arms. That rather violent action landed my poor little baby on his cute bum with quite a thud ... 
This chicken is short but also unfortunately belongs to the heavy people ... He -o*
"Why the Hell did you do that, you crazy broad !!!" Johnny demanded to know when his blond friend and a couple of bystanders had gotten us up on our feet again – clearly meaning my way to negotiating traffic since I had jumped into his arms before and even with similar results without him complaining much.
I mumbled something about being happy to see him.
Since I didn´t think the real reason was something the blond woman should hear.
Then Johnny made me even more embarrassed if possible by presenting the woman as Kitty. And me as; "My girl Meeps" ... aaah *o*
And telling me that same Kitty had just stopped Johnny on the street to compliment him for some magic tricks and juggling he had done at a party last Saturday.
O.K. - she might still have all kind of plans for what she would like to do with Johnny - and I can´t really blame her - I think - sort of ... He -o* ... when I look at all the things I have done to him.
And still would like to do *O* But Johnny's arm around my waist told me I was still his favorite chick *o*
And when I later at the public library told Johnny how jealous I had become he laughed, hugged and kissed me and said; that yes, Kitty was beautiful but he was not going anywhere ...
Oh, by the way - when I come to think of it: YAHOOO !!! *O* !!!
But then my Johnny hit me - gently - on the head with the copy of Lewis Carroll’s collective works he was holding and demanded that this chicken should promise to stop trying to solve philosophically questions by acting them out in real life!!
If he was to stay my imaginary Johnny I had to stay his chicken - not his road kill, he stated firmly!
Eh ...YAHOO! - again? Tshee-hee *O*
So now I really had to promise solemnly only to cross the road either at the traffic light or after having very carefully ascertained that there are no dangerous traffic nearby which risked ruffling my feathers or worse Johnny ordered - or more like pleaded.
I really had to cluck "Yes, Dad" to that - especially when Johnny equally solemnly promise to stay here with this broad broad for as long as we both like *o*
Wouldn´t you have *O* ?